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Bob Dole Index:  (You can also use our search function or sitemap function)..
.Bob Dole's Wit & Wisdom.  Bob Dole on Viagra.  .Limericks/Rhymes about (or "by") Dole.

Dole's Wit & Wisdom (things he actually said to/about various people/topics).

Forbes, Steve.
When asked to talk about Steve Forbes' "good characteristics," Dole said "He has some good characteristics-- they just haven't surfaced yet." (Dole speaking as a commentator on the Daily Show on Comedy Central on 02-03-00 as heard by PoliSat.Com's editor.)  .

Lawyers.
Immediately upon getting up after falling from a platform during a 1996 campaign rally, he said he got a call from a personal-injury lawyer on his cell phone before he hit the ground.  (Heard by PoliSat.Com editor in news-clip of comment by Dole after getting back on his feet.)  .

Sleeping with the President   .
"When I said I'd be the first man to sleep with the President, I was referring to Liddy, not Clinton." (Editor remembers comment by Dole but can't remember the source.)  .

Viagra Voters.  .
"I think there's a big Viagra vote out there." [Statement to Tim Russert on Meet the Press, 1999-03-21] (emphasis added)  ..


Bob Pole on Viagra (things he said or might wish he'd said)  .

Viagra Side-Effect #19:  .
That beer commercial stole Liddy's favorite line:  "Whaaassssuuuuupppp?"

Viagra Side-Effect #18:  .
I think it causes light-headness.  When I said I'd make a contribution to McCain, I had just take Viagra, which was in the process of transferring blood from my brain elsewhere, and if I had waited to speak after it became fully effective, I would have of course expressed my preference for Liddy.

Viagra Side-Effect #17:  .
I think there's a really big Viagra vote out there. [Statement to Tim Russert on Meet the Press,1999-03-21] (emphasis added).

Viagra Side-Effect #16:  .
I keep waking up singing that old fraternity song, "Nothing could be finer than to ... "

Viagra Side-Effect #15:  .
Now I'm really like the Tin Man from Kansas.

Viagra Side-Effect #14:  .
My auto-repairman didn't believe me when I explained to him I was just driving normally with my foot on the gas, and suddenly the brakes engaged.

Viagra Side-Effect #13:  .
All these "up" jokes are getting me down.

Viagra Side-Effect #12:  .
Now I can get up in the morning without having to use an alarm clock.

Viagra Side-Effect #11:  .
Being a spokesman for Viagra has made people more nosey about me-- now they all want to know what time I get up in the morning.

Viagra Side-Effect #10:  .
When people ask me how I get so much done, I tell them I'm up every day at 5:00 am.

Viagra Side-Effect #9:  .
To paraphrase the late, great Richard Nixon, "You won't have the Old Bob Dole to dick around any more.

Viagra Side-Effect #8:  .
Now I know why Strom Thurman always did one-arm pushups on his side.

Viagra Side-Effect #7:  .
While waiting for a table in a restaurant waiting area, I recently had to admonish another gentleman:  "Please!  Sir!   The hat-tree is on the other side of the waiting area!"   .

Viagra Side-Effect #6:  .
Why don't car-manufacturers make drivers' seats that move far enough back?

Viagra Side-Effect #5:  .
Whenever I go somewhere now, part of me gets there before the rest of me does.

Viagra Side-Effect #4:  .
Where are those extra-large Depends  when you need them?

Viagra Side-Effect #3:  .
How come Liddy suggests I could best help her campaign if we split-up so we'd have enough time to campaign effectively?

Viagra Side-Effect #2:  .
I've always been very modest, so why does everyone now think I have a swollen head?

Viagra Side-Effect #1:  .
Sometimes I've had to reassure my friends:  "Don't worry, -- when the press quoted me as saying Viagra made me want to chase 'Liddy,' I wasn't referring to you, Gordon"

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